Hesitation in our relationship with Krsna

Ravīndra Svarūpa Dāsa
nama oà viñëu-pädäya kåñëa-preñöhäya bhü-tale
çrémate bhaktivedänta-sväminn iti nämine
namas te särasvate deve gaura-väëé-pracäriëe
nirviçeña-çünyavädi-päçcätya-deça-täriëe
Dear Çréla Prabhupäda,
Please accept my most fallen obeisances at your lotus feet, which tirelessly traversed this world,
shedding the mercy of Lord Gauräìga at your every step among the condemned internees of this prison
camp.
A number of years ago I undertook an especially sustained effort to x my attention on the holy
name during japa. Whenever my mind wandered, I brought it back, again, and again, and again . . . This
wrestling match with the mind kept on for many, many rounds, day after day. It seemed not to become
easier. At last I noticed that my mind was veering away from the mahä-mantra not out of an attraction to
some object of interest but rather from an avoidance of a strange, entirely mental sensation of discomfort
or distress, which would disperse upon a slacking of concentration.
Why would the mahä-mantra cause distress? I puzzled over this for some days. I’d never heard of
such a thing. I feared something was profoundly wrong with me. I feared I might be a demon. In any
case, what should I do?
I decided that I would simply put up with it; I would keep my attention focused on the holy name
and just endure the distress. And see what would happen.
The distress did not go away, and I persisted in the face of it. Finally, after a week or two, something
happened. Without warning, the pressure of the distress abruptly soared, and an overpowering grief
poured unceasingly from some newly unstopped valve in my heart, as water gushes from an opened
re hydrant.
It was as if this grief had been always somehow contained, under pressure, inside me, and now it
was stunningly released to my consciousness. And while I had been unable to discover the source of my
mental discomfort, I knew at once the cause of my grief: I had turned away from Kåñëa; I had broken away from Him, abandoned Him, and had departed for this material world.
Of course, I had believed this teaching for a long time. But that was theoretical. Now I underwent
the reality. As the grief of the heart owed on and on, there came along with it a revelation in all fullness
of the enormity of my crime.
It was unforgivable. For now I understood completely that Kåñëa was perfect and awless and gracious 42
Śrī Vyāsa-pūjā 2011
in every respect. He was utterly wonderful, through and through. Here, in this world, if a pair of friends,
relatives, or colleagues experience a ruptured relationship, a mediator or counselor enlisted to aid in
repairing the breach will inevitably announce that there are faults on both sides. In this case, however,
in the case of my alienation from Kåñëa, it was starkly evident that the fault was all on my side. Kåñëa
was full of goodness, grace, and charm. There was no fault in Him. The break was all my doing, and I
had to gaze on it without any relieving blurring, acknowledge the full hideousness, the nastiness—the
sheer spitefulness—of my deed.
For the rst time I understood the impulse toward suicide. I was wretched beyond all measure. I saw
no relief, and I was completely isolated in my suffering. Our movement’s vaunted slogan was “Chant and
be happy!” No one ever said, “Chant and be miserable.” I thought, therefore, I was an anomalous case;
if I shared what I was going through with another devotee, he would surely tell me what I already knew:
I was different. I was a demon.
Yet quickly relief came. Grief remained and engendered joy.
It occurred to me that I felt such grief only because I was chanting Kåñëa’s name. Light dawned: if
so, then although I had turned away from Kåñëa, he had not turned away from me. I had already been
granted a sense of the wonderfulness of Kåñëa, and that sense also disclosed my own contrasting vileness
to me, and now I saw even more of Kåñëa’s perfection: however monstrous I had been in rejecting him,
he did not reject me. I saw nothing worthy in myself. Kåñëa cared for me nevertheless. I couldn’t see
why, but He did. That is simply the way He is.
I felt gratitude as great as my grief. And then the full range of Kåñëa’s care became clear to me. For
how was I able to chant the mahä-mantra? Kåñëa had sent you, Çréla Prabhupäda, to bring it to me. I recollected all the difculties and trouble you underwent to come to America. I recalled your preparations
in starting the English-language Back to Godhead in India (in 1944—the year of my birth!), in the long
and solitary undertaking of translating and printing Çrémad-Bhägavatam, in your arriving in America in
your seventh decade, without money, without good health, without institutional support: your one asset
your commitment to the mission of causeless mercy, to the order of your Guru Mahäräja. I thought of all
the ceaseless effort, your gifts to the unworthy. And I saw you as the embodiment of Kåñëa’s care. You
are proof. And so my gratitude grew and grew.
I should note that I received, years later, an explanation of my rst great emotional experience of the
holy name. I was studying the nal chapter of your Caitanya-caritämåta, in which Lord Caitanya recites
the Çikñäñöaka verses to Rämänanda Räya and Svarüpa Dämodara. He recites each one in Sanskrit and
then explicates them in Bengali; Kåñëadäsa Kaviräja also names the various emotions Mahäprabhu
underwent as He recited each verse. The second verse—which describes anartha-nivåtti, or the stage of
chanting while clearing up offenses—presents a stark juxtaposition between acknowledgement of the
Lord’s mercy (tava kåpä) and the speaker’s sense of his own misfortune (mama durdaiva). Kåñëadäsa
Kaviräja writes that when Lord Caitanya recited this verse, He felt two emotions: lamentation (viñäda)
and humility (dainya). When I saw the word “lamentation” my heart jumped. I thought, “It’s bona de!”
And so I understood that my own grief was not anomalous after all.
It is clear that you have given us everything, Çréla Prabhupäda, and spared no effort. Once you told
a reporter in Hong Kong:
They have forgotten Kåñëa, they have forgotten God, and I am trying to make them Kåñëa conscious.
It is a very difcult job. I have to shed my blood three tons before I make one convinced in Kåñëa
consciousness. That is my experience. I have to talk with them, especially these Europeans and
Americans.
Please bless us that we may do for others what you have done for us.
Aspiring to be your most unworthy servant,
Ravéndra Svarüpa Däsa

Seeing potential in everyone - HH Radhanath Swami

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=39dlVUSaUSw

Krsna sees the beauty in every living entity
10.44.04

Chapter entitled the killing of Kamsa.
In the bg Krna teaches u ye yatha mama... according to how we approach Him Krsna reveals Himself accordingly. For one who see Me everywhere and everything in Me ... never lost....
Krsna expands through His energies in everything that exists.

One who is forgetful of Krsna , naturally thinks in term of janasya moham aham mameti... I am this body and all things related to the body are mine. the nature of the soul is ananda- looking for that bliss- existence means connecting with that happiness which is our nature.#

Spiritual love
Spiritual realm ever increasing never ending happiness in Krsna- who is all attractive whose love i infinite and who reveals His love according to our willingness to receive it. When we forget that, we try to find it through material energy because we are identifying with it. when we identify ourselves as eternal servants of krsna- which is our eternal constitutional position then we seek giving Krsna happiness bec that the nature of love.  ahaituki apratihata- spiritual love is not motivated by any type of selfishness or egoism and it cannot be interrupted by any situation- love is to give ourselves totally for the pleasure of the beloved- samsiddhir hari tosanam. Perfection of all of our duties is to whatever extent it pleases Krsna - that is the psychology of  bhakti-there are many psychologies within this world- the psychology of bhakti is  deep profound scientific at the same time its basis is very -- atah pumbhir dvija sresthas varnasrama vibhagasaha- actual goal purpose success of whatever we do and whoever we are in whatever species or position we may be in is krsna is pleased. This consciousness is love. And as the sb explains when you water the root of the tree- janamady asya yatah then naturally that water goes to every part of the tree. When our loving propensity is directed toward Krsna then naturally we will actually perceive that loving propensity is directed towards to Krsna then naturally we will actually perceive the opportunity to please krsna  in everything everywhere and in everyone.

What does "One who sees my everywhere and everything in Me, that person is never lost to Me" mean?
When Krsna tells one who see me in everywhere and everything that person is never lost to Me. In bhakti what is it that we are seeing - if we try to see Krsna's three fold bending form playing His flute in a piece of plastic we may not see it, we may imagine but what are we really seeing, we see Krsna
by seeing the opportunity to please Him through our opportunity to serve and love in everything and in every situation.
Mamaivamso ... every living being is a part of Krsna. aham bija pratapita. Everyone is Krsna's children. Sri Radha is the mother of everyone and Sri Krsna is the father.And everyone is a little part of Krsna.And even material energy inanimate objects it is all Krsna's energy- I am the source of all material and spiritual worlds. Prakriti is the nergy of Krsna.Therefore we see anything- car or a piece of wood- it is Krns'as property and it must be utilized for Krsna's pleasure.

No situation can prevent us from thinking "How can I please Krsna?"
Practical and Doable to see Krsna everywhere- by seeing how can I please Krsna in everything and in every situation .There maybe Tragedies- celebrations- they will come like the winter and summer seasons inevitably- Bhakti is not waiting for the perfect Material situation to come before us- sometimes Maya traps us that way- the perfect material situation when things are going the way I perceive it to be favorable then I can really do something wonderful for Krsna- then I can really flourish in my bhakti.

When people are acting in ways that don't break my heart and cause me anxiety, when situations around me are favorable to actually get something done, accomplishing, when my body and mind are cooperating with what I want to do. That type of devotional service is conditional- and as we recited from SB Bhakti is unconditional. Whether our mind is what it is , whether our body is tired or distressed,whether people are praising us or causing us so much anxiety- whether its a nice AC hall or burning hot in the heat of the indian summer, whatever we make progress by whatever the situation may be how can I please Krsna. There is no situation that can prevent us to think like that- "How Can I please Krsna?" That is the path of perfection. how favorable circumstances are have nothing to do with our spiritual life- how we see the favorable opportunity and potential in every situation is the path toward prema bhakti or love for Krsna. We may have shortcomings- we may be old thinking why did not I learn music when I was young learn to study to read scriptures with deep analysis..... Take another birth and you have to do it all over again. The problem is when you are young you do not think that way, then old say same thing....

Living by what is pleasing to Krsna
It doesn't matter- whatever we are- right now is a perfect situation to surrender- Krsna I am Yours. When Lord Rama spoke to Sugriva, Hanuman, Angada about Vibhisana- anyone who wants surrenders his heart- Krsna or Rama from this day I am yours with sincerity- for that person , I vow before all of you-I become the property of that person, I will always protect that person- even if Ravana who made so many crazy mistakes - even if he came and said "My Lord ,I am yours" I would accept Him. This is our hope. Dina hina ... jagai madhai- if we chant the Holy Name with this sincerity and this spirit- even if we have done all the things Jagai and Madhai have done, if we are willing to just give it up and take it up- "from this day , Krsna I am yours"- that doesn't mean just saying it- it means living it.

When Rama is saying "My devotees or When anyone says My Lord I am yours?" it means that I am living according to what pleases You .. sarva dharama parityaja.... Krsna tells that if one surrenders in this spirit- I shall deliver from all reactions of all sins from the past and deliver you.

When Krsna really wants to bless us - He gives us the opportunity to serve.The washerman missed the chance
 Krsna gives Himself to the devotee who gives Himself this is the universal principle - it was especially demonstrated in Krsna's entering Mathura. Everyone was seeing Krsna according to their nature and everyone was surrendering to Krsna according to their nature. We have discussed last week the washerman- he had done 1000s of 1000s lifetimes of austerity , tapasya for the purpose of seeing God.
And in reciprocation now the supreme original God of all Gods came right to his shop. Can you imagine? People go on pilgrimage so many places here- the SPG is coming right to your shop. He is a washerman he as all this cloth- Krsna says give to Me some cloth. this is what love means- when Krsna wants to show His mercy  He gives us service. BSST would say do not try to see Krsna but try to serve Krsna in such a way that Krsna wants to see you.

When Krsna really wants to bless us , He gives us the opportunity to serve- because in that service we actually learn how to love Krsna. We learn thru so many histories, People see Krsna but they do not have love. Hiranyaksha saw Varaha deva, hiranyakasipu saw Narsimhadeva , Ravana saw Rama, Ravana had Sita- pleasure potency of the Lord living with him- but he was making no progress whatsoever, he was making apradha- because he had no desire to serve , to please. He was seeing the Lord as an object for him- when we come before the Deity we see the Deity as an object for me- the Holy Name is an object for meto relish. Vaishnavas are objects for me to somehow or other to get something from. Then we miss the real opportunity . Seva is the spirit behind everything in Bhakti. trnad api sunicena taror iva sahishnuna amanina maan dena kirtaniya sada harih.This spirit of service and humility when we come before Krsna- Krsna I have come to offer you my love my service ,what can I do for you? When we have this service spirit and we chant the Holy Name Krsna really responds in His Name - because we want to love Him and please Him whether we taste or not taste- the only reason why we want to taste the sweetness of the Holy Name because Krsna is pleased. It is not for our taste - the more we taste Krsna the more there is love and the more Krsna is pleased. The Gopis dressed nicely not so that they could look nice for themselves , but they dressed because it pleased Krsna- they only wanted to be happy bec they knew their happiness made Krsna happy- otherwise they did not care for their happiness. This is Bhakti. samsiddhir hari tosanam- when we please Krsna , Krsna steals the hearts- when we give to Krsna - Krsna gives Himself to us. mat cita mat gata pranah- when we take shelter of Krsna together, and share Krsna by discussing Him with one another and making plans to serve Him together united this gives maximum pleasure to Krsna . This is sankirtana. When we sit and chant it is very nice- Haridas Thakur used to chant 300k names of Krsna everyday, 192 rounds. But during the Rath Yatra in Puri and during Kirtans in Srivas Angan and other places- what a great joy when he was together with all the devotees- together with one heart , with one mind - so many different types of people- kings,clay cup makers, all castes all divisions of society were there in Puri- but one heart when they came together, because their purpose was what will give pleasure to Krishna, Jagannatha and they chanted Hare Krsna....

Difference between a neophyte devotee and a devotee making progress
So the washer-man the ultimate blessing - the opportunity to serve and real service is not what I want- it is what Krsna wants. This is the difference between a neophyte devotee and a devotee who is making progress. A devotee making progress says Krsna a what pleases You, its not about me , its about what pleases You- of course we dovetail our propensities but ultimately how does it make you happy Krsna . That is a question at every moment of life we can be reciprocating with Krsna through asking.

The washerman, Krsna came right to his door- this is what you do,you have cloth, give Me this cloth- it is the same beautiful Krsna that everybody else the greatest lovers of the Lord are seeing. He was angry bec of his association with Kamsa, but instead of pleasing Krsna he started saying terrible things to Krsna.So he missed the chance. Sudama gave everything and Krsna gave everything.

Krsna and Kubja
27:00 As Krsna walked He came across a hunchbacked woman, her name was Kubja and Krsna saw her , she was bent down, libs were deformed due to her hunchback- she was quite unsightly. she had a nice face, but the rest of her body was in a diseased condition from an orthopedic perspective.
She was carrying the most fine fragrances and oils. It was so nice that Krsna actually smelt it and was attracted and He came up to Her and Krsna revealed His own love to her, through His smile , through His charm, His glance , His form. And while everybody in Mathura considered her very ugly, Krsna said "Oh beautiful lady what is this you are carrying". She explained that she was a servant of Kamsa and she introduced herself by the name Trivakraa- bent in 3 places not like tribhanga- Krsna's bends are very beautiful but Trivakra means hunchback bends.
Kamsa liked nothing about Trivakra except that she made the best oils and he faciliated her by giving her the opportunity./ Understand that there was a big ceremony coming up. Krsna , Balarama were invited to the wrestling arena. Kamsa had a big stadium created for this purpose. His ministers, queens , generals and the most distinguished people as well as the common people of Mathura were all going to be present there. Highlight festival he was conducting, Obviously he wanted to be his best. She made very very special mixtures of fragrant oils and cups for Kamsa on that day and he was expecting them from her. He weas a violent cruel dictator, if you did not do wnhat you want- he ends your life immediately. everyone knows if I do not please Kamsa my life will be ended. So Kubja knew the sociology of Kamsa's mathura. So here she was on her to Kamsa's palace to give him these oils and pulps for his pleasure. And Krsna said give the best of these oils to me and my brother. Kubja was so happy, she said that these oils are only meant for you and your friends. The two of you are so beautiful, you have captured my hearts that these oils are your property, for your pleasure I will give you everything that you want. this is the nature of her love. Very similar to the Gopis. When Krsna played his flute on the Vamsi Vata tree on the bank of the yamuna He was calling hem for His pleasure. They did not consider the consequences to themselves they only thought what would be please Krsna. They knew that they could be rejected by society, by family, by everyone, but it pleases Krsna so those things were not even something to consider in their minds.

Sri CM , the greatest of all renunciates, explained the personified ultimate essence of all renunciation is the Gopis. Many of them had husbands, inlaws, babies and everything else. linving in Home. But their spirit of selfless love is the highest aspiration even for the greatest of Yogis and the Brahmanas wives, they also , they were simple gopis- they were the wives of very powerful austere Brahmanas Gurus of society, when Krsna send His friends- give me some food- they went to the forest to offer their bhoga to Krsna.

This is not some secret in the forest- its on the public streets of Mathuyra- people are watching- they are seeing Kubja the ugly hunchback maid servant of Kamsa, when he is in the palace expecting the fragrant oils she is going to give them not just to anybody but to Kamsa's worst enemy. Kamsa sent Akrura to bring Krsna and Balarama for the specific exclusive purpose of killing them- Kamsa hated Krsna - he was thinkign day and night with so much negativity- from a logical perspective it is a serious insult. Very valuable property , king is waiting for it but you give it all away to his worst enemy.
Trivakra understood all this , she knew what was going on, but like the Gopis and like the Brahmanas wives, it wasn't about her- it was Samsidhhir hari Tosanam- you are Hari, you stole my heart, yout stole everything about my life, everything is yours. Thus the only pleasure of her life , was that Krsna just accepts it. So Kubja gave Krsna and Balarama a qty of Kamsa's fragrances- she gave it all away and Krsna was so jhappy- putting on their bodies. and how it smelt so nice- Krsna wanted everyone to see that Kubja gave the pils that belonged to Kamsa- He did it in a way because they were different colors, natural, organic and even Kamsa would not stoop so low to chemicals.

Krsna 's complexion is dark like a monsoon cloud. He took the different ointments that were yellow in clor- so it really could be seen  the contrast of yellow and blue so that everyone could see, Kubja gave Kamsa's oils and it is on Krsna.

Just to make things even more exciting Balarama whose complexion is white like the full moon - he took dark blue pulps and fragrances. The contrast was really extraordinary. He looked like a full moon with many many spots.
41:11

49:42
People like kamsa and jarasandha- the earth was being ex.ploited. As Kamsa was doing that to the earth planet- personifying the earth planet she was a hunchback being exploited by Kamsa and the quality of the earth which is its special significance I am the fragrance, of fragrances I am the earth.
Quality of earth is fragrance. So here is mother earth in a very very exploited condition bent down and disfigured - giving the very essence of the best of what she has - her fragrances.

So Krsna being the Supreme Environmentalist- who doesnt like to see motehr earth being exploited and also bhoktarama ... exploited on so many life- by calling the resources of motehr earth- everything that she provides is an offering to Krsna and an opp for all her children to take and offer her offering to Krsna. but when  exploit, hurt each other, hate, envy, compete in egoistic wayswe have wars with each other, we fight, - that cripples the heart of mothEr earth- its painful. So Krsna was so pleased because she gave the best she had fearlessly- He looked at Balarama and His friends, made them laugh and smiled and looked at Kubja and did something wonderful. He placed His toes on her toes. With His feet covering her toes, then He took one finger from each of His hands and placed them under her chin and with a lovely smile, He very gracefulLy just pulled up and miraculously her back became completely straight. All her limbs were exquisite and she became absolutely, indescribably, incredibly beautiful.
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orDL2WlL8cI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQieUqAK8wE
From Krsna TV servial)

 By Krsna's will He awakened within her heart- Madhurya Rasa- conjugal love similar to that of the Gopids. she wanted to give her heart,her life, body, mind , words and everything to Krsna. She was totally in love with Krsna and He was totally in love with her.........
53:57
Now from another perspective, even though Kubja was very crooked and was in a very very unfortunate pitiful condition physically, Krsna saw the potential in her. Krsna did not see her as a hunchback- he saw the potential in her- he actually gave her the realization of her potential.
She was very humble. Obviously people did not liek to look her, ridiculed her, looked at her with disdain- even Kamsa did not like anything about her except the oils- he would compliment the opils but never say anythign good about her. She was in a very lamentable situation. Krsna saw her potential and because He saw her potential he manfiested it before her- actually KRsna sees the potential and beauty in every living being, that is our hope.

Emotionally, mentally, physically we all have our crookedness
Nityananda Pr saw the potential in Jagai and Madhai. Hanuman saw the potential in Ravana. Ofcourse Ravana was not very cooperative. This is Krsna vision. He descends in this world where there is so much crookedness , but He sees the spiritual potential in everyone. When Srila Prabhupada came to New York, we read in some of the Lilamrita and some of his lectures- these people that were coming were like kubjas very crooked. Taking all sorts of intoxication, illicit relationships, they were not seekers of the truth. Many of them were in a pitiful condition very crooked, SP said and they never took baths.

They were not kubja with nice fragrances.....
He was seeing the potential in everyone and SP on behalf of Krsna - He did not say I will do this- I am your representative, through me I will make these people happy.
Through satsang, through hari katha seva, japa, hari kirtan- Krsna through SP was straightening this up making us beautiful- SP would say now they are bright faced. State of heart- so this is what a vaishnava is that we see the potential in each other , anybody could look at Kubja and say look at that UGLY hunchback with deformed limbs- but the false ego makes it seem that we are really heroic, really learned, advanced because I have the power to condemn other people's faults, to criticize. That's how material energy works, she gives us a certain satisfaction and a certain prestige - prajalpa at its worst- unnecessary talkin - talk whimsically frivolously, the worst is when we talk about the faults of others because it gives me some morbid sense of value- that I can judge another's faults- that gives me an esteemed position- that gives me some superior role. this tendency is very strong-

Rupa Goswami says that the nature of a true devotee is the propensity to find faults with others no longer exists in the heart.So a Vaishnava , a true bhakta is one who sees the potential even when there is the hunchback and the deformation. Unless great souls see the potential in us- we have no capacity and hope to actually be straightened up and restored.
What was our qfn to get such a treasure house. SP said- you had no qfn, I made the qfn.

what was kubja's qfn - Krsna saw her potential and Krsna approached her and gave her the opportunity to serve. SDP saw the potential in us and gave us the op to serve- whatever our hunchbacks- he saw we were perfect devotees in our core and he straightened us up.
This is how we are supposed to deal with each other
In a community of devotees  is yes, there are people with faults, with shortcomings and people that step on each other's heads sometimes, so what- at the time of death its not going to mean anything to us.

When we are on our death bed- 20 years ago we will think you did something, I am going to get you. What is that? nothing.- We make things so significant , when they are so insignificant compared to what the real opportunity is. So this is what a community of devotees- our values- we are all trying to straighten each other up-its not that we sentimentally let people go on with their unfavorable activities.But we see the potential in each other, we are all trying help each other to let Krsna through our Gurus lift us up and make us natural again. So we can see everyone is like kubja with such a potential - to be a beautiful lover of Krsna - this has to brought out and restored. Krsna with His two lotus hands and Lotus feet the way he pulled her up - He is giving us the same opportunity- param vijayate- to become restored to our beautiful natural perfect loving condition- through the chanting of the Hoyl Name...... Hare Krsna ....as soon as she was straightened ecstatic conjugal love came in her hearts. When we are straightened- ecstatic intimate love- prema bhakti awakens in our hearts.


Realizations:

1. Every opportunity in life think about how to please Krsna- that is seeing Krsna everywhere
2. Serve Krsna - wherever you are, whoever you are- its not about service/advancement is possible only in certain types of favorable situations
3. Krsna I am Yours - what does it mean for me to be able to say that. What is blocking me from that?
1. Kubja gave to Krsna fearlessly
2. Kubja was in a very exploited condition- but she still gave the very essence of herself (as mother earth it was her fragrance), the best she had
1. When I feel exploited by anybody- am I able to serve Krsna , give Him my best or is my mind preoccupied with all the disturbances and the anger I have towards people.
4. See potential in everyone- I am crooked mentally, emotionally and physically.But some devotees have encouraged me and helped me to gradually overcome my crookedness. This way I must be encouraging to others also.

Don't solve problems, transcend them

From the lecture:
1994-126 Don't Solve Problems - Transcend Them Lecture Mumbai - Radhanath Swami 1994-09-02 IDesireTree

When are efforts appear to be successful then we become attached and dependent on those material endeavors and facilities- and that attachment to that facility is a greeater bondage than what that facility was meant to relieve you from. 
This is the law of nature- dukhalayam ashasvatam.

Therefore Prahalada Maharaj has said - if you want to be happy in this world you have to stop trying to be happy in this world. In other words- if you want toa void suffering in this world you have to stop making material arrangements in this world to stop suffering, because those arrangements are really the cause of your suffering. 

The ahankar is the cause of endless suffering. Bec we think we are the doer of our acivities but they are carried out by nature. We are trying to solve problems of our life- but if we solve the problems on the basis of thinking that I am the doer. e.g Medicine is trying to get cures for diseases - but the diseases are getting worse........
It is not that the technology is bad- it is the ahankar that is bad. Science has made how much leaps and bounds. Through computers what man can do is unbelievable. Yet there is more durg addiction, alcoholism,crime, wars, water pollution, air pollution, heart pollution. Despite so much advancement in civilization and all our efforts are meant to solve these very problems and we have very excellent trained politicians in the united nations and every capital building. Yet every country is suffering wars, sectarianism, hatred. Why? Without understanding what Krishna is teaching in the BG- all of our efforts to solve the problems only increase the problems of the world.

There is nothing worn with science- technology, higher education- but as long as these endeavors to solve the miseries of material life-through these processes are under the misconception that I am the doer- as long as we are trying to solve the problems on the level of material attachment and material misconception that I am this body and everything in reln to this body is mine- we only make things worse. 

Therefore Krishna gives this simple solution- daivi hyeshi.... This material nature is difficult and impossible to overcome, but one who surenders s to Me can easily cross beyond it. And what does it mean to surrender to Krishna.- man mana bhava mad bhakto... that always think of me, become my devotee, worship me and offer homage unto me and in this was you will come to me without fail- it is said in SB- fear personified is fearful of Krishna. CC says that Krishna is like the sun and all the darkness of illusion that is the cause of so much suffering, strife and disharmony - in the presece of son darkness cannot exist. When we remember Krishna with love, with devotion, with sincere attention then all the miseries of material existnce cease to exist. Bec the miseries of material existence are illusory. Because Krishna says that the soul cannot be killed, cannot be cut by any weapon or made wet by rain. It is transcendental, when we realize our eternal identity as jivatma then all the material miseries cease to exist. Then para dukha dukhi- we see the misery in others and want to help them- give them reliefTo give a straving man food it gives him reliefe but to give him the food of Xcendental knowedlge and harinaam you can mitigate his hunger for bliss for knoweldge and joy for etrnity. We approve giving temporary relief but CM has the medicine that will cue the very source of all disease and end all suffering and that is the Holy Name of Krishna and if we take this medicine regularly acc to th prescription of the doctor who comes in the form og Gurudev, Sashtra and sadhus-they are giving us the proper prescription of how to take the chanting og the Holy Name it must be taken regularly everyday. Within our movement we chant 16 malas- but it must also be done with great attention, concentration and feeling- what is the feeling- Krishna your HN is my only shelter. BVT has prayed- I have seen and considered everything in all the 14 worlds and my conclusion is only the name of God can save me. Due to the false ego we are under the ullusion that we can save ourselves- through our money, influence, high education. But so many people have everything but their lives are a mess - time is consuming their lives and they are doing nothing about it. And their near and dear ones- go against them, are diesseased , they die- but we cannot do anything to control it. The more we think we can control in this world- the more we are controlled by Maya. whoever we are rish, poor, educated or poor- we understand that I simply live in harmonyby Gods will, purify my heart and become a Good servant of God then by Gods grace all the problems of existence are solver- that doesnt mean you will not grow old, disease and die- you cannot solve the pblm on the level of the pblm but you Xcend that. If you associate with lotus feet of Krishna then are consciousness becomes lotus like- it becomes pure- Om apvaitra pavitra va. Even if He walks on this world where everyone is suffering material existence - He is aloof , Xcendental and above it- if we fix our consciousness and focus on it we can be of this world but not of this world.

Chant the Holy Name iwith feeling- Krishna Your Holy Name is truly my shelter in life- we must chant th eHN in the mood of seeking shelter if teh HN.

Dying to Live

Material illusory consciousness is a consciousness of exploitation , real consciousness is a consciousness of service.

Lecture Link:
Dying to Live

Death of the ego is a process- most important - basis of all spiritual paths.

Just like Gold- put it in fire the fire burns away all the gross coverings and as long as the gold is in fire the more its natural shine emerges- more and more beautiful.

Sandalwood- the more you rub sandlwaad the more its natural beautiful fragrance manifests.

From one point of view we can understand theoretically we are eternal servants of Krishna . However in our life and in the process of purification , making actual progress there will be many challenges and obstacles . If we with proper integrity and proper spiritual direction we pass through those obstacles it brings about realization.Jnana begins Vijnana which is synthesis- the holistsc understanding reln with God, other living beings and material nature.

In order to make progress in the spiritual path- Die to Live- there must be elimination of our condn state to exploit to accumulate and to possess and acceptance of a path of humility purity and service. Seva or service means death tot he Ego- very powerful our constitutional position. Not only do we want to dismiss the eog or cause deatch to it. We want to live acc to our real ambition to live in a state of complete fulfillment divine life and divine love. Freedonm means to surrender to the truth. To serve the mania of this world is slavery, but this is the ignorance of th world- we are thinking that slavery to the mind and ego is freedom and to live a spiritual oriented life is slavery. SP- Godbrother spoke to Lord Deathlin- He had a deep appreciation for BG and Vaishnavas and he asked can you make me brahmana- Yes we can its not a matter of birth but of quality- simply follow these four principles- He honestly looked to the saint and said - impossible- How will I live? From the purpose of reality to be addicted to all these things and hta infatuate the false ego that is slavery. Milton had written the opinion of Satan - To reign in Hell is better than to serve in Heaven- that is the modern day philospy of life in its blatanat and honest form. If we want real life we have to understand the opposite principle.Krsna says bhoktrarama - real peace is to understand that I am meant for the enjoyment of God- my constitutional nature is to serve. Sacrifice is the quality of real love, not to take, not to accumulate, not to possess but to give to serve. That is spiritual quality our nature- that is where we fine real happiness. Actually death means Xformation . Gross physical level when somebody has died - body undergoes Xformation.

Death of the ego means Xformation of our consciousness and in that Xformation there is real life.

One of my Godbrothers wrote a beautiful song here he describes how a caterpillar just by nature's process- enteers a cocoon very restricted place- but through that austerity process- it is Xformed to a butterfly- caterpillar not very beautiful but butterfly is the most beautiful of all insects.

Area of Garbage dump- we mad eit into a very nice garden with scented flowers and trees and now spo many butterflies are coming.

Xformation of our heart is reqd- Xformation of our desires from living the desire that I want to enjoy to I want to serve.

Is any one really satisfied with any amount of accumulation of wealth, prestige. People in the wealthiest parts of the world are speckidng their money in Psychiatry, anti depressant pills- even suicide- dependence on intoxications- just to ease of the frustration of life. Fame , power, material wealth cannot bring happiness and ultimately we are living for these things - what is the culmination - Death it is all taken away. Xformation means to have the proper attitude to strive for what is real , true. nasato vidyate bhava- what is real is eternal everlaasting, What is temporrary is illusory. People may challenge how do you know the soul is eternal , how do you know there is God?- unless we have faith in these principles how will we strive to live for that when there is so much opposition?

Philosphically, logically, socially the scriptures and teh great saints every religios paths and saints througout history they ahve lived and died for that truth.

When we are given this name of the servnat of God- that is the process in which we Die to live. I am now leaving behind my false ego temporary designations- I am now identifying myself and living according to my real identity of a servant of God. The Spirit  Soul is infinitesimal only a tiny spark. Surrender the spirit of dying to live to wholesale offer everything we have for the pleasure of the Lord- it is not that such a little particle of ourselves only wants to offer a small particle of a small particle. Material senses surrender means to lose- just like Gandhi did his nonviolent process and Bose helped with violent process. Ritain had to give in. India won, British lost. Aliied forces won and the Axis lost and they lost because they surrendered. Surrender is undesirable by force. But in sanskrit the word Saranagati is something very different, it means when Krishna says sarva dharma partityaja- surrender is the most positive expression of our gratitude and our love. It is ultimately the most joyful experience of the heart. There cannot be love without surrender. Love is selfless for the beloved. SB explains sa vai pumsam.....The Supreme Occupation for all humanity is loving service... unmotivated uninterrupted.

One thing can give pleasure of the heart- sitting place of soul and that is love- to love and to be loved. What is the meaning of love? Described in CC- kama expression in which we enjoy for ourselves- it cannot be satisfied- as long as we are trying to enjoy for ourself- it is like fire the more you feed it the more hungry it grows. Love is the complete giving of the heart for the object of our love. The most satisfying relns are not the Romantic affairs you see in the movies- real pleasure of the heart comes through satisfaction of the beloved.